Today's Sermon

From May 18, 2009
Today's sermon

Gather in and take a pew. Open up your book to Kevilations 1,23.

Skip past the part about Lizmas and the trials of the Skittery's Lament. Take a left at Seino's Perdition and you'll find today's subject.

And so Kevin's dream was this: to be left alone. Less and less he wanted from the world around him. There are no more dreams in this black world. Beyond it there is a serene blankness. Nothingness.
This is the situation he found himself in. Bereft and blank. Slowly, he turned from his friends. He sees less and less of them and withdraws from the tribe around him. One by one he shuns them. He refuses their comfort and solace to face the darkness of truth alone.

It is at this point in the middle part of his life, with nothing left but his intellect, that he loses himself along a forest path. Down the path rolls until he comes upon a great set of gates. On them is written "Abandon all hope of finding better deals. Lucifer's electronics bazaar."
Inside were lovely deals on flat screen TVs and laptops. Turns out Satan had given up the evil business and was making it big as a discount retailer. Kevin's only Kevilation was that you had to stay away from the 1 soul same as cash deal and the credit card interest rates included torture.

So, Kevin bought a nice TV with surround sound and had a party for all the friends he was ignoring and asked them to forgive him for being a jerk. And he bought beer. Really good beer.