Santa is awesome. AWESOME I SAY

WHAAT? Some jerk just posted a blog calling Santa evil. How is that possible? For God's sake he brings toys to little kids. What kind of maladjusted human being goes after Santa?

Wait, it was me?

Well, let me just say, I must be wrong. Santa has made children the world over happy for generations and will continue to do so for generations to come. Although, his single-minded obsession with children seems to be a bit creepy. Not to mention that at some point he was supposed to have helpers who were either black or shackled demons.

Still, Santa is an institution. A harbinger of all that is good and heck, Coca Cola has all but given us this holly jolly good-natured fellow. They even say so on their website, "Most people can agree on what Santa Claus looks like -- jolly, with a red suit and a white beard. But he did not always look that way, and Coca-Cola® advertising actually helped shape this modern-day image of Santa. Starting in 1931, magazine ads for Coca-Cola featured St. Nick as a kind, jolly man in a red suit. Because magazines were so widely viewed, and because this image of Santa appeared for more than three decades, the image of Santa most people have today is largely based on our advertising.

Before the 1931 introduction of the Coca-Cola Santa Claus created by artist Haddon Sundblom, the image of Santa ranged from big to small and fat to tall. Santa even appeared as an elf and looked a bit spooky."

Uh, wait, does this mean Santa is an advertising whore? No, I won't believe it. He is Santa DAMNIT.

Now Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. He was a shill. He was created by the Montogmery Ward's department store and he was their exclusive property. The song was written by an advertising man.

Now I'm confused. I still say Santa is awesome. Now give me a damn gift you fat bastard.



Top Signs Santa Loves You

1. He left you that inappropriate lingerie. But it was nice lingerie.
2. You take a shower on xmas morning get out and there's a heart with "You my Ho, HO Ho" written in condensation.
3. He gives you something, even if you've been a little naughty.
4. You reach into your stocking and find a Nintendo DS.
5. He ate the cookies and drank the milk.
6. He gave you a Lexus and that jerk of a cousin only got socks.
7. Hey, he brought egg nog.
8. He never asks for anything in return.
9. He left you some Coke. (uh, the drink. Ya.)
10. Duh, gifts.